All too often, we worry about things we cannot control. Airyl is currently pursuing her master’s degree in Language Studies while waiting for a chance to travel the world and tell stories about her experiences. By definition, you often can’t directly affect the future, but you can affect incremental steps right in front of you. What about taking some small steps instead? These are real, logical thoughts, that you just came up with. But no matter what concerns you hold close to your heart, worrying about them is no way to live. You can influence people and circumstances, but you can't force things to go your way. Allow them to give you some fresh perspective about how to handle things that are out of your control. That doesn’t stop us from getting worked up over things beyond our sphere of control. Almost everything in life is uncertain. For this reason, defining what’s worrying you in the past and future will help you separate the two and live more in the moment, where there aren’t any direct negative feelings (because you either worry about something that’s going to happen or did happen, and rarely about something happening at the time).

Instead of thinking about what-ifs, make it a goal to become forward-looking.

And then once they’re written down.

Your entire workday should be planned out with a calendar or scheduling tool. While you could simply try to avoid people because of your social anxiety, that isn’t very practical. I promise by focusing on the task at hand and not worrying about the rest, you’ll be better off for it. Try new things, hold your head up high, and surprise yourself with the things that you’re actually capable of doing. Another way to stop being a worrier is to take the courage to do something different. Whether it’s worrying about what people think of you, what the day will bring, or anything else, simply sitting and meditating with your fears can help you shift focus.

Getting out of your comfort zone can surely make a difference to how you view things. This is a little trickier because by definition, you can’t control these things, and this lack of control causes you to worry and stress. Of course, by definition, anything that may or may not happen in the future is outside of our control. And there goes everything that it is possible to worry about. As it relates to this worrying about things I can’t control, I’ve been down that road many times. You’re worried about things – we all are. When we worry about the past, we’re worrying about things that we can’t change and letting negative emotions linger longer than they should.

10. And by focusing on it, you exacerbate the worry and anxiety. Now, break down the events, people, or themes causing you to worry into two categories – things you can control and things you can’t. And while some issues, due to their nature, cannot be ignored, you can jettison many worries without harm.

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